Help! I Lost My Wedding Ring

I was eating one (sleeve) of my favorite cookies, those delicious Vienna Fingers with the cream in the middle, when I first noticed it was missing. Panic set in. Holy crap. WHERE was my wedding ring?

I searched high.
I searched low.
I searched the inside trash.
I searched the outside trash.
I searched the hamper.
I searched the washer & dryer
I searched the bureaus.
I searched the bathroom.
I searched the drains.
I searched the bed.
I searched behind the bed.
I searched the radiators.
I searched the kitchen.
I searched the dishwasher.
I even searched the fridge.

I confessed to my wife I had lost the ring.  It’s the one thing you’re never supposed to lose and it was gone.  The search continued.

I searched the car.
I searched the cracks between the seats.
I searched the glove compartment.
I searched the trunk.
I searched all around my job.
I searched my office.
I searched the space behind my desk.
I searched the bathroom at work.
I searched spots on the way to work.

WHERE was my wedding ring?
Days went by.
More days went by.
I began searching places again.

I searched the inside trash.
I searched the outside trash.
I searched the washer & dryer.
I searched the bureaus.
I searched the bathroom.
I searched the bed.
I searched behind the bed.
I searched the kitchen.
I searched the dishwasher.
I even searched the fridge.  Again.

WHERE was my wedding ring?  More days went by.  Days turned into weeks.  HOW did I lose it?  WHERE did I lose it?  A sense of doom set in. I just knew it was gone. So I went to drown my sorrows in my favorite cookies. I grabbed the tray of Vienna Fingers and sat down on the couch. Those delicious cookies.  I dragged open the plastic to grab a cookie and my ring popped out from the tray. Right there. All along. Dear god.  I put the ring back on my finger with a satisfied sigh of relief. I finished off the rest of the cookies.

 

*this is a true story and yes I’m still married… I’m surprised too

 

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About dadmissions

author of Dadmissions. surrounded by a wife and two girls... and a dog named Cupcake
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