Dadmissions: The Whoopie Cushion

so I knew the kids were plotting against me… they hatched a plan to try and get me to sit down on a homemade balloon whoopie cushion

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so I played along like I didn’t know… the six year old and eight year old were whispering and trying to shove a balloon in my jeans while distracting me… then I sat down on the chair but boom… it wouldn’t pop… they looked confused but I played along like I didn’t know anything else.. I tried twice more… to roughly sit down to pop the damn balloon but the freakin thing wouldn’t pop… I got desperate… you know in Rocky when his eye won’t open and he says “cut me mick… cut me”… so I went into the kitchen and told my wife to fork my butt… fork it… just cut my balloon so we can start the popping process…
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so she did… and then I ran to sit down again and boom… I sat down just in time to hear the tiniest popping sound from my rear… pop… and then I pulled out the balloon fragments and they still had a good laugh despite the nuclear strength balloons which wouldn’t pop on their own… the things we do for our kids

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About dadmissions

author of Dadmissions. surrounded by a wife and two girls... and a dog named Cupcake
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